More Humor From Tymoshenko

To dispel the treason allegations leveled at her by the Presidential Secretariat, Tymoshenko has resorted to humor.

PM Yulia Tymoshenko: I think in addition to that we're absolutely, positively guilty of Hurricane Katrin [sic], we’re guilty of all the tsunamis that swept the globe, and that’s why I think that this person is not being original. The only thing he does is pass the buck to everyone around him.

PM Yulia Tymoshenko: I did actually undergo eye treatment. I have some problems. Now I’m doing a casting call: I’m looking for a dog guide. [giggles] I’ll be looking at the people decisions in the Secretariat. Perhaps they’ll find something for me, Okay? [giggles] As for the second question, an accusation of national treason (right?), they charged me with seven counts, such as love for Ukrainian salo, you know, love for Ukrainian borscht. What other exotic stuff do we have here? But let me tell you that all this is nonsense. Honestly, I don’t want to comment on this. How are we on time?
Response: 25 minutes.

PM Yulia Tymoshenko: Well, in five minutes I’ll be leaving for the shooting range to train myself to do some shooting, you know. Right now, my sight is not really well, but I think that my health will improve and then everything will be fine, Okay? The optical weapons are already in place, waiting for me at the range. [giggles] Oh, dear friends, you know, politicians can make mistakes, but what politicians can’t do is they can’t afford to look funny because it completely ruins the image of a politician. Therefore, I would advise all the politicians of Ukraine not to look funny in their public relations events.

If that was a stroke of self-deprecating humor, it certainly helped her image. Unlike Yushchenko, who totally lacks it, Tymoshenko does have a sense of humor, but often uses it to duck questions.

This evasive technique may not sit well with critically-minded voters. Nor does it sit will with people, young and old, whom she promised to abolish the draft and return their Soviet-era savings.

Videos uploaded from:
http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/94314.html (STB http://stb.ua)
http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/94190.html (Channel 5 http://5.ua)

Tymoshenko Responds to Accusations of Treason

Recently, deputy chief of the Presidential Secretariat Andriy Kyslynsky accused PM Yulia Tymoshenko of pussyfooting on the Russian invasion of Georgia and lobbying for Russia’s use of the Odesa-Brody pipeline.

He also alleged that Tymoshenko has held secret meetings with pro-Russian power brokers and associates of former President Kuchma on board luxury yachts off Sardinia. It was there that, according to the Presidential Secretariat, she traded Ukraine’s vital interests for the Kremlin’s support, which includes a $1B slush fund for her presidential campaign in 2010.

Watch Tymoshenko’s response.

Such statements by small-time officials do not warrant commentary but, to be honest, they warrant the services of a…well, a good carpenter to have the plaque at the Presidential Secretariat replaced with one that would read "Ward Number Six." Never in my whole life have I been to Sardinia, neither now nor before, and…[giggles]…if the Presidential Secretariat doubts that, they can ask the sardines that swim around Sardinia…[giggles]…and I think that even the sardines will testify that…and they can tell categorically that the Prime Minister hasn’t been there.

Whether honest or not, her answer sounds like a canned joke, doesn’t it?

Even if Tymoshenko did not have secret relations on that island Sardinia, her widely-publicized tandem with Kuchma’s henchman Medvedchuk, a friend of President Medvedev, makes the connection all the more dangerous. In the legendary “Candyman” (2004) video, starring Kuchma, Yanukovych, Medvedchuk and guest-starring Putin and Medvedev, you can find Medvedchuk on Medvedev’s right side.

According to Obozrevatel, which ran a detailed story on Tymoshenko’s vacation, EU intelligence agencies track vessel movement via satellite and share their data with the SBU. That’s how, Obozrevatel says, Tymoshenko’s presence on board luxury yachts that belong to Shufrych and Medvedchuk.

Among the people Tymoshenko met with, Obozrevatel names Dmytro Firtash of RosUkrEnergo, Serhiy Lyovochkin of the Party of Regions, as well as “unidentified Russians that could be prominent entrepreneurs and politicians.”

So what’s in it for Ukraine? Now that President Medvedev-Putin has rubber-stamped the Duma’s recognition of South Ossetia and Abkhazia, Crimea could be next on his list. The weaker Ukraine gets, the stronger the temptation to apply the same scenario becomes.

With this cautionary tale in mind, theories regarding "Tymoshenko's treason" range between two possibilities. On the one hand, the Presidential Secretariat may simply be playing the Russian card — in an attempt to resuscitate Yushchenko’s approval ratings. But on the other hand, having an Octopussy run for president would hardly be a bon voyage for Ukraine.

It’s important that Ukrainian politicians and presidential hopefuls unite against the threat of Russian irredentism and remain on the right side.

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Man Who Killed 6 People DUI Gets 10 Years

Andriy Poltavets, 37, the heavily drunk man who killed four adults and two children after plowing his SUV into a crowd at a tram station in Kharkiv, has received 10 years’ imprisonment. That’s less than two years for every person killed by Poltavets, who has a past history of DUI.

The ruling, which includes a 3-year suspension of driver’s license, was made today, Channel 5 reports. Asked about how she felt, a relative of one of the victims expressed feelings of injustice and insecurity.

So here’s what “one law for all” means in this case: Once you get drunk and get in that car and start killing people, there’s no limit to how many people you can kill. You’ll only get 10 years, plus a 3-year suspension of drivers’ license. Well, perhaps you’ll even get paroled, which means you can start killing even sooner!

Welcome to Ukraine!

Ukraine Celebrates Independence Day, Kyiv Holds Military Parade

Today, Ukraine celebrates its 17th anniversary of renewed statehood.

On August 24, 1991, a few days after the failed coup in Moscow, the Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine declared our independence from the Soviet Union. The rest is history, a bittersweet history of lost of opportunities.

Anyway, I couldn't miss today's parade.




The day started warm and sunny (and ended cloudy and rainy)



As I suspected, Maidan was for VIPs only


So I hurried back to the upper Khreshchatyk Station on Instytutska St....


...to take a dive and reemerge at Khreshchatyk







Sweltering in that uniform, aren't you?






From Ukraine with love and peace!


Some people sure know how to climb



Lieutenant General Ivan Svyda, commander of the Ground Forces, commences the parade




Defense Minister Yuriy Yekhanurov drives from Maidan, salutes troops; troops salute back



Driving back to Maidan





Troops on standby to march forward












They're marching! The audience is responding.


They're coming...


Hurray!
BTR-80, BMP-1 "Shkval"


In order of appearance: T-64 BM "Bulat," 2S1 "Gvozdika," 2S3 "Akatsiya," 2S19 "Msta-S"








BMP-2






Heading for NATO! The Humvee is replacing the UAZ-469.


MT-12 "Rapira"




9K51 "Grad"


In order of appearance:
BM-27 "Uragan," BM-30 "Smerch," 9К79 "Tochka-U" (SS-21 "Scarab B"), 9K33 "Osa" (SA-8 "Gecko"), 2S6M "Tunguska," Buk-M1, S-200 (SA-5 "Gammon"), S-300 (SA-10 "Grumble")

Now let's do a little flying!


In order of appearance:
Mi-8, Mi-24


The remaining birds are a bit trickier for me to identify...
An-30 escorted by two Mig-29s, right?


Il-76 escorted by two Su-27s?


I'm not sure what some of these birds are...but the first four look like Mig-29s, followed by three Su-24Ms, one Su-24MR, four Su-25s and four Su-27s.

In 2001, they closed the parade with the An-124 "Ruslan" flying in formation with the An-225 "Mriya," the world's biggest aircraft (no kidding)...produced in Kyiv, Ukraine! (Click here for a video chronicle of parades held in Kyiv since 1917.)

Airshows in Ukraine don't always go as planned. In July 2002, we had the Sknyliv tragedy, which killed 85 people and injured over 100.

Thankfully, everything was fine this time.





Z Dnem Nezalezhnosti tebe, Ukrayino! Happy Independence Day, Ukraine!

Yushchenko Wants You to Be Happy!

Very happy. Watch a public service announcement geared for Yushchenko’s re-election bid.

Voiceover: August 23, 9:30 a.m.
Maidan Nezalezhnosti (Independence Square)
Flag Day

President Viktor Yushchenko will lift the national flag of Ukraine at the main square of the capital.

August 24, 10:00 a.m.
Maidan Nezalezhnosti
The Commander-in-Chief of the Ukrainian Armed Forces, President Viktor Yushchenko, will be hosting the military parade.

August 23-24
Maidan Nezalezhnosti
Join the celebration! Let’s celebrate together! Every one of us is a part of an independent and free Ukraine.

Text: Happy Independence Day!

I greet every Ukrainian with Independence Day!

Sincerely,
Viktor Yushchenko
Signature

There’s nothing unusual about camouflaging political ads as social ads or public service announcements. But who did the “happy faces” at the end of this one? And who put them on bill boards all over Kyiv?

To many people, the dilated eyeballs of the ecstatic young duo may symbolize drug use, outshining Komsomol posters. (View here, here, here, here, and here)

Besides, many young people (except Yushchenko’s kids) may resent such a glowing portrayal of a “free and independent” Ukraine that scores low on economic freedom and depends on the oligarchs’ mercy.

Don’t they have any focus groups in their creative departments?

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Bicycle A Trophy for Russian Troops in Georgia

Watch this interesting footage showing a Russian infantry fighting vehicle carrying a bicycle on board.



After a Georgian reporter confronted them, the Russians, who initially claimed having brought the bicycle all the way from Russia, decided to dump their trophy.

The Russian top brass, who have vowed to crack down on looting, pride themselves on having arrested some of their soldiers caught in the act. But actions speak louder than words, don't they?

The chain of command appears to be just as bicephalic.

Major General Vyacheslav Borisov, deputy commander of the Russian airborne forces: Our commander, our big commander, ordered us to take control over the entire security zone that was mapped.

Reporter: Who gave you the order?
Major General Vyacheslav Borisov: The Commander-in-Chief did.

Reporter: Medvedev or Putin?
Major General Vyacheslav Borisov: Well, I’m not that big of a boss to know who gave the order.

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Downed Russian Pilot Claims Innocence

Narrator: The highest-security residents of Gudushauri Hospital stay alone neither at night nor during the day. Colonel Zinov, a Russian pilot downed over Tskhinvali and captured, has already been charged with assassinating Georgian citizens. Unless the POW is exchanged, he faces 15 years’ imprisonment.

Colonel Igor Zinov: Unlike you, I’m always portrayed as some kind of, I don’t know, monster of sorts who wants to kill everyone. Let me tell you what I told them: Not a single bomb was dropped from this aircraft, and I’m clean before Georgia. [Learn more here.]

So, the fact that they dropped you before you would drop those bombs on them makes you clean? That’s a jaw-dropping confession to make!

Inter, Ukraine’s leading TV channel, has taken a somewhat pro-Russian stance on the Russo-Georgian conflict.

Some experts believe that control over the channel may have shifted to Dmytro Firtash, a co-owner of RosUkrEnergo and a friend of Viktor Yanukovych.

Russia has accused Ukraine of supplying Georgia with the Buk-M1-2 (“Grizzly”) surface-to-air missiles that it says shot down three Su-25 (“Frogfoot”) fighter jets and one Tu-22M (“Backfire”) bomber.

Meanwhile, the Ukrainian Air Forces flew over Kyiv today in their final rehearsal before the Independence Day parade that will be held on August 24.

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All Is Fair In Love, War, and Kremlin Propaganda

Remember the “Hitler Doll” tale? Here’s another one, dedicated to the bicephalic Generalissimo Putin-Medvedev and his Georgian incursion.

Narrator: Another friend of Saakashvili’s is Ukrainian President Yushchenko, a big fan of Ukrainian Nazis, Stepan Bandera and Roman Shukhevych, a supporter of recognition of Ukrainian SS troops.

President Saakashvili, a Kyiv Institute of International Relations alum, reciting Taras Shevchenko’s “Testament” in Ukrainian:

Як помру, то поховайте
Мене на могилі,
Серед степу широкого,
На Вкраїні милій,
Щоб лани широкополі,
І Дніпро, і кручі,
Було видно, було чути,
Як реве ревучий.
Як понесе з України
У синєє море
Кров ворожу...отойді я
І лани, и гори-
Все покину і полину
До самого бога
Молитися... а до того
Я не знаю бога.
Поховайте та вставайте
Кайдани порвіте
І ворожою злою кров’ю
Волю окропіте.

Saakashvili and Yushchenko have a lot in common both in terms of habits and value systems. By the way, following Yushchenko, Saakashvili called Georgian soldiers of the Wehrmacht and SS ‘fighters for the freedom of Georgia.’ In summary, Saskashvili has a hiding place. [an obvious reference to Holland, the home country of First Lady Sandra Elisabeth Roelofs, Saakashvili’s wife]

One can hurl apt epithets at Yushchenko and Saakashvili, but 'Nazi' can never be one of them unless you sing from the Kremlin’s twisted hymn sheet.

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Thank You for Staying With Ukrainiana!

I'll be vacationing for about 10 days and will get back to you as soon as I get back to Kyiv.

Peace!

Kill 6 People, Get 5 Years

Quick Facts

Venue: Kharkiv, Ukraine
Defendant: Andriy Poltavets, 37
Crime: Vehicular homicide, DUI
Victims: 4 adults, 2 children
Expected penalty: 5-10 years’ imprisonment
Status: Pending trial

“One law for all,” as Yushchenko put it during the 2007 parliamentary campaign.

Sources:
http://obozrevatel.com/news/2008/5/8/235985.htm
http://video.oboz.ua/movie.php?aWQ9MTY1NzEmdnQ9Mw==

Yushchenko Thinks Positive

President Yushchenko: I’d say we've had enough of being how something is ruined, how something is drifting. Now let’s show how we start rebuilding things — to raise the spirits.

Putting out fires. Rebuilding flooded homes. He’s the man. If your home doesn’t get rebuilt by winter, call him.

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Tymoshenko, Yushchenko on Reconstruction in Flood-Hit Areas

Here they are, sounding as optimistic and can-do as the upcoming presidential race behooves them.

PM Tymoshenko: People have water, bread, food, and prices are not being ramped up by profiteers as is the case in other disaster areas. Flood water is being pumped out; almost all residential areas, except for one, have electricity. Besides, as for gas supplies, there’s only one problem town.

President Yushchenko: Funding has been allocated, an emergency meeting of parliament has been held. We have everything. Now, slowly but surely, with consensus in the community, we will proceed with reconstruction, starting with roads, electricity, communications, gas, homes. We’ll do everything.

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Stalin the Saint: Russian Communists Seek Canonization for Soviet Dictator

In a soul-searching under-empire where some view Jesus as the proto-Communist and Lenin as Jesus, why not put a halo on Stalin?

Russian Communist: After Nicholas II, we have the full right to offer to the people, to the populace, this icon of a saint, of a true saint who spared not his life. True, as any human being, he did sin, but Alexander Nevsky did not shed just the enemy’s blood either. So what? That’s the way history goes.

Stalin’s sins include millions of people he massacred and starved to death — Christians, Muslims, Catholics, and atheists.

A seminary dropout in his youth, Stalin commands grassroots admiration among the nostalgic elderly and certain groups of disenchanted youths. Stalin’s legend: He came into an agrarian Russia and left it with the atomic bomb. His genocidal footprint may therefore be dismissed as “collateral damage,” this school of though argues.

What the Germans call Ostalgie the Russians have carried a step further, Russia being a much more troubled society. Russia’s poverty and boomeranging identity sends it searching for heroes in, well, hell.

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Soundtrack: "Spasibo, Velikiy Uchitel" ("Thank You, Great Teacher")