Lutsenko’s wife: How can one tolerate such a lie? It’s just impossible! Why are you staring at me? Why are you staring at me, liar? You’re gonna be impotent! I’m looking right into your eyes. You’re gonna be impotent!
We are Ukrainian women. We are the FEMEN movement. We are the watch bitches of democracy! Our god: woman. Our weapon: bare breasts. Our goal: government. European Union, accept us! Kremlin, leave us alone! Ukraine, let’s be together! Ukrainian women, come join us, get topless and win!
If some of that sounds naïve, join this Ukrainian Army beauty contest.
Yanukovych: These people that will be dismissed, they will receib...receive corr...corresponding severance packages upon dismissal, in accordance with the law. [...] The benefits...from the reduction of government officials’ headcount will not transpire until 2012. From then on, every year, undoubtedly, we’ll have quite substantial savings.
You mean, having 16 ministers instead of 24 will save us a fortune? Awesome! But wait... Is that the whole story?
It’s not. I mean look at the State Directorate for Affairs. This funny-name agency acts as the nanny state to Ukraine’s mammoth central government bureaucracy.
In FY 2011, its budget will balloon 27%, or by Hr. 292,856,700 ($36,822,962), to Hr. 1,343,862,300 ($168,973,394).
Now what about the Administration of the President? Wanna see the color of his money?
Yanukovych: Because the rule of law...uh...abiding...by the laws of Ukraine is compulsory for all. Today...in Kyiv, they’re already setting up, on the very spot where the protesters’ tents stood yesterday...uh...today, they’re already setting up the New Year...[struggles with Ukrainian, settles for Russian]...YOLKA [tree], and very-very soon people will start celebrating the New Year.
Yanukovych: They’re rubber-stamping permits and licenses...and they’ve got regions, business, entrepreneurs and industrialists standing in line. [...] I’ll tell you, I’ve been in that line too. I would never come to Kyiv...alone. Because I didn’t have enough hands. And when we flew...when I flew by plane, two or three [entourage] cars would follow.
Thank you for sharing, Uncle Vitya! Has logistics improved since then?
I mean look at Uncle Lyosha. He looks like he could use a hand.
