Countering Communist ‘Language Barrier’ Anti-EU Ads

Whatever happened to “Workers of the world, unite”?

ЕС - плохая игра from Компартия on Vimeo.

“EU accession is a bad game. Even kids understand this.” 

That’s probably the one that makes the most sense. It combines both emotional and logical appeals, hinting at Ukraine's unequal bargaining power with the EU. OK, that’s a big one right there. Nice femdom angle! Of course, in reality, no one’s talking about accession. All we get, hopefully, is association. Well, that’s beside the point. Still, I’d make the Ukrainian boy and EU girl look like Yanukovych and Merkel, respectively, for comic effect.

But what’s with the girl? Why does she suddenly switch from *EU* to *Customs Union* mode? “Boy: Can I play with you now? Girl: Sure!” Whoa, are they about to play doctor in there? If so, isn’t it a bit downright gender-bender confusing? Considering that Putin is not a girl yet?

The rest of the collection looks like crap. Plain and simple. And instead of calling Commies on their crap, the opposition actually validates these ads. By trying to have them banned! Communist-style?

Brief Analysis
Message: “Didn’t get a word of this? Foreign language, foreign union! We speak one [the same] language [Russian]! The Customs Union.”
Target audience: Eastern Ukraine mostly, monolingual Russophones and surzhykophones
Appeal: Emotional, multilinguaphobic 

The opposition calls these manipulative. I call them masochistic.

English
Мы с вами говорим на одном языке. Английский from Компартия on Vimeo.

Ever wonder why so many rich Russians and Ukrainians are shipping their kids abroad and parking billions of dollars offshore? Maybe it's because they’re not buying any of this?

French
Мы с вами говорим на одном языке. Французский from Компартия on Vimeo.

As if France wasn’t so USSR-friendly during and after WW II and French movies weren't so popular around here in the 60s, 70s and 80s.

German
Мы с вами говорим на одном языке. Немецкий from Компартия on Vimeo.

Doesn’t Putin speak German and Merkel Russian?

Not to say there are no undercurrents to the EU Association Agreement and DCFTA. But these masterpieces don’t hold any water. And here’s how the opposition can turn Commie propaganda on its head. Lenin and Stalin loved kids, didn't they? GET THIS GIRL.



And this one too!


And use this English class movie scene!



It’s from “Guest from the Future,” a Soviet children’s/teen cult film of the 80s, the local mishmash equivalent of “Terminator” and “Back to the Future”. Take it and drive it home to Eastern Ukraine. Refresh their memory. Remind them of Alisa Selezneva. How she came from the bright Communist future of 2084 into the not-so-bright present of 1984. And how she surprised the hell out of her classmates with her English. “I’m not very gifted. I only speak eight languages,” she said. The Soviet kids of tomorrow were supposed to be THAT fluent in foreign languages.

Tomorrow is now.

'We Will Stop Them!' Opposition Ad Targets Unemployed Youth

It’s Yanukovych’s pot of gold v. Tymoshenko’s prison bidet.

Placement agency: There's no work for you.

Jobseeker: New proFFessors? [a dig at Yanukovych (aka 'ProFFessor') and his luxury-packed Mezhyhirya residence] Knowledge still not in demand around here? Connections and bribes work better, huh? It's not honest work that's valued, but one's ability to steal and cheat. They don't need educated people. They dream of us becoming a herd of slaves. We can't live like that anymore. They must be stopped.

Voiceover: We will stop them! United opposition. Fatherland [Tymoshenko's party].

Nice try, guys! I almost felt like buying this. But then I thought again. And again. And now I have some questions for you.

Can you practice what you preach? Can the guy in the ad make it to the opposition ticket without “connections” and “bribes,” so to speak?

What about this opposition lady? What kind of “knowledge” did it take for her daughter to get such a nice government job?

Sources:
http://censor.net.ua/video_news/216398/batkivschina_snyala_rolik_o_zolotom_unitaze_professora_video

Yanukovych Buys Drugs, Burns Drugs (Publicity Stunt)

He bought “marijuana, cocaine and so on” online to alert law enforcement to the availability of “prycho...psychotropic” substances.



He then sent his procurement team offline to burn the stuff in front of the cameras, with all the necessary paperwork.



Oh no! Why didn't you keep that fire burning so Hillary could put it on her resume?



I wonder if Yanukovych drew his inspiration from this scene:



Videos embedded from:
http://www.pravda.com.ua/photo-video/2010/07/1/5190004/

Tymoshenko v. Yanukovych in Round 2 Commercials

In Ukraine, campaign commercials look like never-ending advance fee fraud letters.

The more promises they break, the more promises they make.

She goes from she to you, in a hard-sell message that contrasts her with him and offers a slice of death for the skeptics.

Voiceover: Think. Ukraine has a choice to make. You’re choosing a future — your future. You’re choosing: Ukraine will be energy-independent or he will sell out the pipeline and will make you a gas addict. You’re choosing: You’ll have the land or he will steal it — like he stole Mezhyhirya. You’re choosing: Your dreams of freedom and decent living will come true or he will bury them. Think about the future you want. Think about Ukraine. Think about yourself. Protect Ukraine. Yulia Tymoshenko.

He goes government-bashing, teasing and solution-selling in a slice of life populist message, complete with a thank-you note and change rhetoric.

Voiceover: In this campaign, we’ve heard a lot of words from the government. They tried to convince us why we should elect them again. On January 17, the people of Ukraine had their weighty say. It’s time to ignore their talk and look at the facts. When you read between the lines of government reports, you see the grim truth coming out.

Yanukovych: The people of Ukraine had their weighty say on January 17 and I’m grateful for your support! The people said they’re not ready to trust hollow promises when they need true changes. The people said they’re not ready to make peace with such a state of affairs when they need real help. The people are not ready to accept defeats that are being portrayed as victories. It’s time to unite and vote for real changes.

I can’t help but recall that Tymoshenko quote:

And believe me, all this huge false advertising, all these huge false billboards — it’s just falsehood, as is any advertising.

Videos uploaded from:
http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/146220.html
Original sources:
http://5.ua
http://kanalukraina.tv

‘Everything’s Gone!’ Cartoons Blast Tymoshenko

“Everything’s Gone!” owes its name to Tymoshenko’s 45 seconds of infamy as the-lovelorn-lady-about-to-address-the-nation.

The soundtrack is a parody of “Ти ж мене підманула,” the popular Ukrainian folk song about a young man whose date didn’t show up.

The refrain of the original song goes like this:

You made a fool of me
You failed me once again
You made me drool over
And you made me go insane

The refrain of the first cartoon soundtrack goes like this:

I fooled you all, people
I failed you all, folks
I want to be president
And I've got enough dough

In the cartoons, the Tymoshenko character starts with “I” and waxes poetic. She covers just about everything:

Part 1: Soviet savings, broken military promises, lies, gas, Gazprom, Putin;



Part 2: Communists, Lytvyn, IMF loans, tax returns, Louis Vuitton, talk shows, Yatsenyuk, Ratushnyak, “She’s working;”



Part 3: White Tigress=White Rat, white rats=Tymoshenko cronies, kleptocracy, broken promises, brainwashing;



Part 4: Pedogate, Kuchma cronies in BYuT, Hubsky, Lozynsky, Yushchenko, “With YU❤kraine at Heart,” Pugacheva, kleptocracy.



Brought to you by Obozrevatel, the popular online engine controlled by Mykhailo Brodsky, who has a love-and-hate relationship with Tymoshenko.

Videos uploaded from:
http://prikol.obozrevatel.com/info/638.htm
http://prikol.obozrevatel.com/info/708.htm
http://prikol.obozrevatel.com/info/797.htm
http://prikol.obozrevatel.com

Battle of the Billboards 2010 (Part 1)

Watch Kyiv on the eve of the first round of the presidential election, on the first days of the 2010s.

The pics and vids you’ll see capture the mood and motion in Ukraine’s capital January 1 through January 13.



Pace yourself by clicking II and using => <=. Click here for my December slideshow.














Putting things into perspective: a bottle of Soviet Sparky










Tymoshenko morphing into 100% beef!




Bingo! I hit the jackpot!




Yanukovych the Terminator meets Yanukovych the Teaser: “I know I’ll Come”

Battle of the Billboards 2009

They're everywhere. They want our votes.



Pace yourself by clicking II and then -> or <-.













Anywhere you go, they'll follow you down...

Tymoshenko Equates Herself With Ukraine (Part 4)

She just can’t get enough of mixing her feminine mystique with her “L’Etat, c’est Moi” ideology.

PM/presidential candidate Yulia Tymoshenko: She’s with those who take a step forward. She’s with those who save people. She’s with those who can love. She’s with those who can forgive. She’s with those who love life. She takes pride in those who can be really strong. She’s with those who always reach their goals. She will win. She is Ukraine.

You mean she’s not with those who plunder, squander, divert, consort, extort, murder, hit-and-run, take bribes, quadruple-charge, rig, sell out and depopulate?

“She’s being raped and yet she’s working” represents what country?

You promised to bring those quadruple-charging intermediary crooks to justice. Where are they? Are they going to jail or to your birthday party?

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/140099.html
Original source: http://5.ua

Tymoshenko Equates Herself With Ukraine (Part 3)

“Each of us is being taken care of by Stalin in the Kremlin.”
“Stalin's kindness shines on the future of our kids!”


“Thanks to native Stalin for the happy childhood!”

Welcome to the 21st century! She’s larger than she.

PM Yulia Tymoshenko (voiceover): Every day, I work till late night because I know that my every minute is for the sake of the people, for the sake of my native Ukraine. I know that millions of people work a lot every day as well because they know that today their work is needed like never before. Every minute, our country smelts ore, sows bread, heals the sick, creates art, teaches and brings up kids. It is she, our best country. She works. She is Ukraine!

Never mind that it’s the oligarchs who own the plants, the cops and the courts, and it's she who serves them.

Never mind that your labor earns them billions of dollars and leaves you struggling to make both ends meet.

Never mind that Ukraine ranks 85th out of 182 on the Human Development Index.

If she lived like you do, would she call it “our best country?” Or would she run away?


“Life's getting merrier by the day.”

“Beloved Yulia — people’s happiness.”

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/135106.html
Original source: http://5.ua

Yanukovych Keeps Hearing Things

Have you ever thought of Yanukovych as a genie? Here’s your chance. You call him, and he’ll take you for a magic carpet ride!

Voiceover: Does your opinion matter? Viktor Yanukovych believes it does. And he wants to hear you. Tell him what troubles you most. He’s listening to you.

Quick, what’s the difference between Yanukovych and a genie?

A genie only hears you until you tell him your third wish. Yanukovych only hears you until you vote for him.





Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/134539.html
Original source: http://kanalukraina.tv

Tihipko: “Ukraine Has to be Strong!”

Serhiy Tihipko. A former banker. One of Ukraine’s richest men. Yanukovych’s 2004 campaign manager, who jumped ship once it became apparent that his boss had crashed and burned in the Orange Revolution.

A spoiler candidate in the 2010 campaign who painted Ukraine with teaser billboards such as “What will be the exchange rate in the fall?”

Serhiy Tihipko: We deserve a life in a rich country. We have fertile farmlands, a robust industry, an educated and hardworking people. What is our problem? Irresponsible government. Lack of professionalism and will. We must leave a rich country to our kids and grandkids. Ukraine needs will and responsibility. Ukraine needs a strong and professional government. Ukraine has to be strong!

A dead ringer for Kevin Spacey, isn’t he? Only a bit more serious. Or less.



Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/133698.html
Original source: http://5.ua

Yanukovych: “I Hear Everyone. And I’m Ready to Help Everyone.”

Presidential candidate Viktor Yanukovych: You're seniors and worried about your pension. You’re young and concerned about unemployment. You’re a farmer and don’t know how to harvest your crops. You’re concerned about whether there’ll be heating in your home in the winter. You believe that the government only cares about how to stay in power. You feel betrayed and humiliated. I hear everyone. And I’m ready to help everyone.

He forgot to say:

Rick Astley - Never Gonna Give You Up
Загружено trashfan. - Смотри другие видео клипы

Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/131552.html

Back on the Billboard

As Ukraine verges on the brink of a snap parliamentary election, political advertising starts springing to life again. Well, in some cases, it never stopped.




In a bid to “keep up with the Yushchenkos,” stabilnist daddy Yanukovych courts Ukrainian youths with a verse from the Ukrainian national anthem: “Upon us, fellow Ukrainians, fate shall smile once more!”




So far, fate has smiled on the offspring of Yanukovych and Yushchenko more generously that it has smiled on ordinary Ukrainian youths.

Ironically, the copy's bucolic setting adds insult to injury because young Ukrainians living in the countryside grapple with the worst job market. Unless, of course, they take their chances with labor migration and find dangerous work in Russia or the EU, as millions of Ukrainians have done.

Finally, Yanukovych often rhetorically contrasts Ukraine’s “industrial East” with the “agricultural West.” In the latter, he sees "free riders and foes," in the former "friends and worker bees."

So where does this countryside idyllic posturing leave him?

Yushchenko Wants You to Be Happy!

Very happy. Watch a public service announcement geared for Yushchenko’s re-election bid.

Voiceover: August 23, 9:30 a.m.
Maidan Nezalezhnosti (Independence Square)
Flag Day

President Viktor Yushchenko will lift the national flag of Ukraine at the main square of the capital.

August 24, 10:00 a.m.
Maidan Nezalezhnosti
The Commander-in-Chief of the Ukrainian Armed Forces, President Viktor Yushchenko, will be hosting the military parade.

August 23-24
Maidan Nezalezhnosti
Join the celebration! Let’s celebrate together! Every one of us is a part of an independent and free Ukraine.

Text: Happy Independence Day!

I greet every Ukrainian with Independence Day!

Sincerely,
Viktor Yushchenko
Signature

There’s nothing unusual about camouflaging political ads as social ads or public service announcements. But who did the “happy faces” at the end of this one? And who put them on bill boards all over Kyiv?

To many people, the dilated eyeballs of the ecstatic young duo may symbolize drug use, outshining Komsomol posters. (View here, here, here, here, and here)

Besides, many young people (except Yushchenko’s kids) may resent such a glowing portrayal of a “free and independent” Ukraine that scores low on economic freedom and depends on the oligarchs’ mercy.

Don’t they have any focus groups in their creative departments?

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/93673.html

United Center Gears Up for Convention

Voiceover: Ukraine’s has long been searching for a center that would unite the efforts of many patriots to achieve a common goal. Kyiv, July 12: The United Center Convention. United Center!

Timeline:

1990: human chain between cities; declaration of Ukraine’s independence
1992: Ukrainian banner is raised
1996: Constitution is adopted
2004: Orange Revolution
2006: Ukraine’s soccer team makes it to the FIFA World Cup semi-final
2008: Ukraine joins the WTO; Europe Day is held in Ukraine

Caption: United Center, grassroots support.

Not only does this ad mess with the mind of the audience, but it also messes up the timeline.

Ukraine declared independence in 1991, not in 1990 as shown in the above timeline. On July 16, 1990, Ukraine declared sovereignty while remaining a part of the Soviet Union. Ukraine would not declare independence until August 24, 1991.

The blue-yellow Ukrainian national flag made its way to the floor of the Verkhovna Rada on August 23, 1991, not in 1992 as the timeline says. And why portray Ukraine’s accession into the WTO by running a picture of U.S. Ambassador William Taylor delivering a speech at an ACC event?

Now let’s set the record straight on the United Center. What does United Center stand for? United Center stands for United Center of Shyrka, or Yushchenko’s grand coalition with certain members of the Party of Regions.

Speaking of narodna opora, (grassroots support), narodna omana (grassroots deceit) would sound much more coherent.

Or how about “The grass is greener on the Regions' side, now that we’ve pissed away the Orange Revolution?"

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/89332.html

Euro 2012: A Euro-Optimist Ad

90 minutes that gather together fans. Two times that bond teams. One championship that unites the nation. A step into Europe is made with a football boot. Under the blue-yellow banner, let us welcome the entire European community! Let’s get together. Because we deserve it. The road to Euro 2012 is a step into Europe!

The Terminator-like voiceover can be identified as the Party of Regions’ tub-thumping tone during the September 2007 parliamentary campaign. With Ukraine close to getting the boot from the UEFA over poor preparations, why not look on the bright side of life? After all, if you own real estate in, say, Monte Carlo, you're already in Europe, right?

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/88995.html

Back to 2004: The Yushchenko I Voted And Rallied For (But Won't Again)

Presidential candidate Viktor Yushchenko: My slogan: “I believe, I know, we can.” I say “I believe” because I believe in Ukraine. I believe in every one of us. I believe that we will build a state where everyone will be proud to say: “Yes, it’s my Ukraine.” I say “I know” because I know my responsibility. My deeds should benefit everyone, regardless of whether they like Yushchenko or not. I say “I know” because I know what to do. I proved that at the National Bank and as Prime Minister of Ukraine. I say “we can”: “we can” is the will and inspiration of each and all of us. Together, we can do everything. There are millions of us, and our people are talented. We have the richest soil and a glorious history. We can live human lives. Everyone will be able to make a decent living for themselves and their children by doing lawful work. We will build a fair and humane society. We will bring about the changes that every Ukrainian has been waiting for so long. The strong will support the weak; the rich will help the poor.

Voiceover: Yushchenko will win! Everyone of us will win. And there will be changes!

The government fears change. We’re being convinced that everything’s fine. Just don’t change anything.

Voiceover: Let’s rid Ukraine of the bandits. It’s our chance and our responsibility. On November 21, come to the polls and vote as your conscience tells you. Every vote for Yushchenko is one more “no” to the unbridled bandits. Let’s protect our families and our future. Yes to Yushchenko! On November 21, all honest people will come to the polls and will serve justice to the bandits. Goodbye the country where greedy oligarchs, shameless officials, and smalltime scoundrels prosper. Hello New Ukraine, a Ukraine of prosperity and love! May goodness dwell in our hearts and souls! Peace to our home! Yushchenko is running for president. And Yushchenko will win!

Presidential candidate Viktor Yushchenko: I believe in Ukraine. I know my responsibility. I believe, I know, we can.

Voiceover: Yushchenko! Peace to you!

Videos uploaded from: personal archives

Anti-NATO Slide Film Shown in Soviet High School

NATO IS A THREAT TO THE WORLD
A Slide Film for Grade 10



In Russian, the word мир (mir) has two meanings: world and peace.

This slide film mixes facts and figures with Soviet propaganda.

The use of “Vremya vpered” (“Forward, Time!”) as part of the soundtrack surprised me. In the ‘80s, this piece of instrumental music by Georgi Sviridov served as an intro to the Soviet news program Vremya (Time). (If you play piano, you can try this.)

I guess the soundtrack found its way into the video by the person who shared it, not by the anti-NATO propagandists. The slide film dates back to 1985.

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/87722.html

NATO Info Campaign Kicks Off

They’ve finally launched some NATO commercials. Note how these two build on the Euro 2012 theme.

The North Atlantic Alliance was founded in 1949. Among NATO members are the majority of European countries, Canada, and the US. The main objective of NATO: collective defense of freedom and security of allied member countries. They are ready to defend common values by both political and military means. NATO is the big league, high standards, successful countries.

Ukraine and NATO:
SHOULD BE TOGETHER!

Videos uploaded from:
http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/87568.html
http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/87460.html

Brodsky Uncut

Enjoy these two versions of a Mykhailo Brodsky commercial. Brodsky, a former BYuT member, is running for mayor.

I will not keep mum. I will not tolerate theft.

I will not keep mum. I will not tolerate theft. Eat this! Hahaha!

Don’t you just trust the guy?

Source:
http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/83591.html