Tons of Dead Fish Rot Away on Dnipro

When Ukraine’s elites dumped water from the dam to rescue their splendid riverfront villas from spring flooding, tons of fish died.


Trapped under heavy ice in receding coastline waters, some of the fish became fair game for hordes of fishermen. With the ice gone now, the rest of the fish litters the Kyiv Sea coastline — in what looks and smells like a miles-long mass grave.





Naturally, it’s no disaster, as far as the government is concerned. They didn’t notice it. They still don't notice it. It’s not their job. Thus, no cleanup effort has been undertaken.

As the fish decompose and pollute the water, Kyiv’s supply of drinking water remains safe and under control, authorities say. Just a little smelly, but that’s OK.

Videos embedded from:
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Original sources:
http://5.ua
http://tsn.ua
http://kievtv.com.ua

FEMEN Gives Shufrych an Earful on 'Shuster Live'

FEMEN knows how to grab attention.

The self-styled Kyiv-based activist group has been around for a while, professing feminism and protesting against sex tourism, human trafficking, prostitution, flu mask-mania and sexual harassment.









Actually, when it comes to FEMEN, I prefer the term shocktivist.

One of their latest public protests had them acting out near-pornographic scenes: scantily dressed female college students harassed by sex-for-grades college professors.

Naturally, the pornified event didn’t go unnoticed. Outside the Ministry of Education building, in front of the cameras, the deputy minister promised them to look into the problem.



They have a busy schedule. Their latest television appearance saw them on “Shuster Live,” a popular political talk show.

Watch the vinok-clad FEMEN shocktivist steal the show.



“Don’t believe these liars!” shouts the lady and hastily wraps up her sign out of everyone's sight. “Ukraine is not a brothel!” reads her T-shirt.

Unlike Michaele Salahi, this lady doesn’t look like she came uninvited. It’s amazing how Savik Shuster grabs her by the waist and doesn’t get slapped in the face.

MP Nestor Shufrych (PRU) had a lot of nerve parking his sorry ass on “Shuster Live” — with a suitcase full of broken promises. Namely, he forgot to follow through on his Oct. 2 promise to pass legislation “on Tuesday” [Oct. 6] that would have criminalized pimps and clients.

Frankly, I don’t see a single civilized country that has managed to ban prostitution (as opposed to having reduced or regulated it). Nor do I always see FEMEN acting in protest-oriented (as opposed to publicity-oriented) ways. But I do support their drive for accountability.

Holding politicians to their promises is what we must do. Love that “Fucking Hell” T-shirt (0:58-1:00)!

It’s about time we gave them the fucking hell they deserve.

Videos uploaded/embedded from:
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Original sources:
http://kanalukraina.tv
http://tsn.ua

A Tale of Two Conventions: Yanukovych v. Tymoshenko

They’re working. They want it all.

MP Hanna Herman (PRU): When you’re standing, you feel some sort of movement. And we here are ready to take the first steps.
MP Serhiy Kivalov (PRU): People were saying really sincerely that the only candidacy from the Party of Regions is Viktor Fedorovych Yanukovych.
MP Oleksandr Kuzmuk (PRU): There will be order in the country.

Reporter Mustafa Nayem: What happens if Yanukovych doesn’t win?
MP Nestor Shufrych (PRU): No way!
MP Vladyslav Lukyanko (PRU): What? It’s unrealistic! You know, I think Ukraine will lose everything.

Kharkiv Mayor Mykhailo Dobkin (PRU): Yanukovych will definitely win. It’s just a question of how much he scores in the first round and how much in the second one.
Singer-supporter Taisiya Povaliy: But he will win!
Dobkin: It’s a situation when Yanukovych will be competing with himself.
Producer-supporter Ihor Likhuta [Povaliy’s husband]: All the candidates are decent people, but ours is the most decent one.

Vice Premier Oleksandr Turchuynov (BYuT): It’s a very serious event, one on which our country’s future depends.
Singer-supporter Pavlo Zibrov: I’m a grown-up person and I made a choice, and those kids running back and forth are just making money, I think.

Reporter Mustafa Nayem: Many are saying it’s a Maidan [protests] rehearsal in case Yulia Tymoshenko doesn’t become president.
Turchuynov: You know, Maidan cannot be rehearsed, it cannot be arranged technologically. Either you have it or not. Our Maidan is in our hearts.

MP Andriy Shevchenko (BYuT): Yulya is cute?
Daughter: Yes!

Turchuynov: [Welcome] Yulia Tymoshenko!

Reporter: Don’t you have the reflex to shout “Yushchenko?”
Shevchenko: Hahaha!

Interior Minister Yuriy Lutsenko: No, [incoherent]. In 2004, Yushchenko was the only way for the country not to roll back. Uh...but it’s only idiots and corpses who don’t change their points of views.

Reporter: What happens if Tymoshenko loses?
MP Serhiy Sobolev (BYuT): I can’t even imagine.

Video embedded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/137142.html
Original source: http://kanalukraina.tv

The End of Maidan, According to Shufrych

As the Orange kolkhoz grows ripe for divorce, the vultures are salivating, expecting to reap a huge harvest.

MP Nestor Shufrych, PRU: Somebody has to be held responsible for what’s happening in this country today. Let’s make a scapegoat out of someone, let’s sacrifice him and hide ourselves. I want to say that it’s not going to happen this way. It will start with Lutsenko and everybody will have to pay. But this will not merely be the end of the Orange team; it will also be the end of Maidan.

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Rescue Raid Gone Awry

We didn’t understand why some 32 SWAT officers were invited, to put it mildly, for a "talk" with three MPs, as a result of which MP Lukyanov’s car, with Lukyanov inside, was displaced. When I came up and said, “What are you doing? There’s a live human being in that car,” for some reason, they lost composure and dropped it. And it so happened that they dropped it on my leg.

— MP and former Emergency Management Minister Nestor Shufrych, PRU recapturing his Friday “free Rudy” experience outside the private clinic Borys.

Nestor, you know more about emergencies that I do. Therefore, let me keep my pep talk simple and stupid: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. My high-octane cheerleader songbook of choice would be:

Tatu “Not Gonna Get Us”
Chip’n’Dale Rescue Rangers Theme
Meat Loaf “I’d Lie for You (And That’s the Truth)”

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Regionalists Go Looney-Ballooney

Tuesday’s session of the Verkhovna Rada ground to a halt minutes after it opened amid anti-NATO mayhem from members of the Party of Regions.

Speaker Arseniy Yatsenyuk: Due to the fact that I'm missing a mike, I will try to speak by open outcry.
MP Nestor Shufrych, PRU: The cheerleaders have arrived.

Speaker Arseniy Yatsenyuk: This session’s agenda included a host of issues pertaining to proposed bills on government procurement, on lifting MP immunity, on ad hoc investigation commissions and other legislation, which needs to be passed today by the Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine. To my greatest disappointment, a brutal violation of the Constitution and of The Law of Ukraine on the Status of a People’s Deputy is in progress. In view of that, I see no possibility to commence the plenary session of the Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine. Thank you for your attention. You will be notified of the next meeting in due time. Keep working, dear colleagues!

Regionalist 1: Andrei! Andrei! Andrei, let him out!
Regionalist 2: Turn this shit off!
Regionalist 1: I just...who is it?

The last guy almost sounds like Michael Jackson in "Who Is It?":

(Who is it?)
It is a friend of mine
(Who is it?) Is it my brother?
(Who is it?)
Somebody hurt my soul now
(Who is it?)
I can't take this stuff no more

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Shufrych: “¡NATO NO PASARÁN!”

More on NATO. MP Nestor Shufrych, PRU, former Minister of Emergency Management, speaking at an anti-NATO rally outside the Verkhovna Rada:

Let us recall the words of the revolutionaries who were stopping fascism. They said: "¡No pasarán! They shall not pass.” Today, we say: NATO shall not pass!

What about Spain’s NATO membership? Either Franco still rules Spain, or Shufrych got his rhetoric wrong.

In fact, it wasn’t until 1982, when the transition to democracy reached an advanced stage, that Spain became a NATO member.

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Hurricane Yuliya Makes Landfall on Kyiv City Hall; Cher Runs for Comfort Station

The nemesis of Ukrainian politics has refused to sit idly and watch Kyiv go through another crony capitalism attack. After all, in the March election, 39 percent of Kyiv voters, more than in any other city, put a checkmark next to BYuT.

Tymo, accompanied by BYuT MPs, Tuesday paid a series of visits to the City Hall, where she engaged in a live-broadcast war of wards with Mayor Chernovetsky.

According to Tymo, at the end of the day, Cher and his loyalists barricaded themselves in the bathroom on the tenth floor. (No jumpers spotted.)

Cher said Wednesday he will scale back his 340 percent utility price increase, but he didn’t specify to what extent.

Let us hope that the magnitude of Yuliya’s next appearance in the City Council will merit the attention of the newly-appointed Emergency Minister Nestor Shufrych.

Mr. Shufrych, rated as a walking emergency by many, gained prominence as a member of the pro-Kuchma SDPU who carried the torch for presidential candidate Yanukovych all the way until the bitter end in the courtroom.