Parliament Sacks Ohryzko (Updated)

The Verkhovna Rada Tuesday fired Volodymyr Ohryzko, Ukraine’s foreign affairs minister, who had recently reprimanded Russian ambassador Viktor Chernomyrdin for meddling in Ukraine’s internal affairs.

The move gathered 250 votes: 174 from the Party of Regions, 27 from the Communist Party, and 49 from the increasingly pro-Russian BYuT.

“First, let them think and then talk, and not wag their tongues,” Ambassador Chernomyrdin was quoted as saying, reflecting on Ohryzko’s note of protest.

Tymoshenko resented Ohryzko’s direct reporting relationship with President Yushchenko. “As Minister, Ohryzko radically did not suit me. It's a person that is not professional, a person who systemically engaged in provocations against the government.”

To hell with political correctness! It's about time Tymoshenko appointed Сhernomyrdin Ukraine's foreign affairs minister!

Sources:
http://www.pravda.com.ua/news/2009/3/3/90614.htm
http://www.pravda.com.ua/news/2009/3/3/90620.htm
http://www.pravda.com.ua/news/2009/3/3/90657.htm
http://www.ukranews.com/eng/article/181238.html
http://gska2.rada.gov.ua/pls/radac_gs09/gol_karta_zal3?g_id=5277

Yushchenko Talks Treason, Chernomyrdin Talks Sex

Yushchenko, who accused Tymoshenko of shedding crocodile tears, seems to be unaware of his own crocodile tears.

President Yushchenko: Talks between Tymoshenko, the Communists, and the Party of Regions are not going smoothly not because it’s hard for them to agree, but because there’s one problem: There’s no societal acceptance for such an alliance. That’s what ails them. And that’s why there are blueprints for how to split someone from Nasha Ukrayina, for how to split someone from [the] Lytvyn [Bloc]. In other words, there needs to be façade to show that the democratic process is not a lost cause.

Well, well, well, Mr. President. People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. Is there enough societal acceptance for your PoRNUNS dreamboat and that dirty little United Center splinter group of yours?

Russian ambassador Viktor Chernomyrdin, a gas tsar-cum-PM-cum-diplomat, has perfected broken syntax into art, punctuating it with sexually suggestive humor. Here’s my attempt at translating his recent remarks:

Ambassador Chernomyrdin: Now, whatever the occasion, whatever the occasion, there’s always the "pro-Kremlin hand." Why are they messing with those hands? What’s bothering them? What is it they find missing? We’re not extending no hands nowhere. We’re extending them with good intentions only…and with help, including help for Ukraine. During hard times, we’ll always extend...what’s necessary, and will deliver.

We Russia are working with heads of state. Yushchenko got elected, we worked with Viktor Andreyevich* — we’re still working. Whoever gets elected in the next election, we’ll work with them. And as for who we hold dear to our hearts, or who we hold dear below our hearts, it’s a different story.


*patronymic transliterated from Russian

Is he talking about hands or some other private parts? I, for one, have detected phallic allusions in his humor.

With that hand-below-heart anatomy class, I think he did a great job at Kremlinizing some of our already well-PoRnified female presidential hopefuls. Russian diplomats can be so open-hearted!

Videos uploaded from:
http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/96625.html
(original source: http://www.kanalukraina.tv)
http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/96481.html
(original source: http://inter.ua)

Finance and Friendship: Chernomyrdin Draws the Line

We’re working, we’re already finishing up February, and we still have no deal. Things don’t work this way. It’s unnatural. We can only do this out of friendship, out of accord. Time goes by, and yet our work is such a mess. And tomorrow they’ll say: We didn’t take this. We didn’t receive that.

There’s no confrontation. It’s just that you have to pay for what you take. When you go to the store, you pay. You go to the store, don’t you? The same applies here.

— Viktor Chernomyrdin, Russian ambassador to Ukraine since 2001

Seven years on the job, and there’s not a smidgen of clientitis about him!

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/77599.html

Russian Ambassador Can Tell Tymoshenko from Scarecrow

Narrator: The question was as follows: Will Tymoshenko not scare away the Russian investor?

Viktor Chernomyrdin, Russian Ambassador to Ukraine: Well, to me she doesn’t look like a scarecrow. Why paint her like that? At least, she always stated that…um…she understands it very well, and she herself was in business, and as a business person who knows about the economy…I don’t think she will [scare away the Russian investor].

Some diplomats have the merit of complimenting women in a rather unorthodox manner.

Video uploaded from: http://censor.net.ua/go/offer/ResourceID/71695.html

Chernomyrdin, Luzhkov on the Holodomor

The first is the Russian ambassador to Ukraine. The second is the Mayor of Moscow. Ideologically, they come from the same school of thought.

Chernomyrdin:

There was the Soviet Union, there was the famine, a great famine. And yes, Ukrainians suffered, and Russian and other nationalities, including all those who lived in Ukraine.

There are so many emotions here. We don’t understand it. I don’t know who stands to gain from this and why all the emotional outbursts.

So the famine in Leningrad was caused by crop failure and food supply shortages, right?

Luzhkov:

The conduct of the youths who spoiled all the showcases, having drenched them with Coca-Cola, should be called complete incivility and vandalism.

At the same time, should we speak about the political aspects of this exhibit, we could say that it had the purpose of disuniting and alienating the citizens of Russia and Ukraine.

Certain political forces wanted to link the Holodomor to the actions of Russian authorities, but they forget that the Holodomor occurred not just in Ukraine, but also in the Povolzhye region and in Kazakhstan.

What, should we blame the Holodomor in the Povolzhye region on Ukraine?

It seems to me that this exhibit had one purpose: to disunite and alienate the Russian and Ukrainian peoples. But nothing will come out of their efforts; no government can alienate us.

Do they keep those Auschwitz, Buchenwald, and Treblinka museums just to incite hatred between Jews and Germans?

Solar radiation from the Sun and nuclear radiation from Chernobyl are natural phenomena. True or false? If true, then how about someone pisses on your head and tells you it’s raining? How would that logic grab you?

Sources:
http://www.pravda.com.ua/news/2007/11/21/67185.htm
http://www.pravda.com.ua/news/2007/11/22/67232.htm
http://www.interfax.com.ua
Images uploaded from:
http://pix.lenta.ru/news/2007/09/12/answer/picture.jpg
http://img2.nnm.ru/imagez/gallery/5/f/9/f/f/5f9ff4f8fbff8bf322a59ed41c3c3d8e_full.jpg